So just to be clear… Elon’s preparing to unleash his legal team—not on Wall Street’s financial terrorists shorting companies into oblivion, or regulators asleep at the wheel—but on a U.S. Congresswoman who compared him to a certain 1940s German dictator known for terrible mustaches and worse policies.
No, really: This is the same Elon who once posted a meme comparing Trudeau to that guy and laughed about it. But now that he’s the target? Suddenly it’s lawyering-up time.
Meanwhile…
- FTDs? Sky-high.
- Off-exchange trading? 40-60% of daily volume.
- Cellar Boxing? Confirmed since 2004.
- GME float? Censored based on your IP via Yahoo/Morningstar.
- Regulators? Ghosted like an ex on Valentine’s Day.
- Elon? Butthurt over mean tweets.
You could literally crowdsource 1% of Elon’s net worth and hire a team of forensic accountants, market structure experts, and attorneys to obliterate Citadel’s BS in court. Instead, he’s spending time and cash because someone in Congress played the “H” card.
Let me repeat that: the richest man on the planet—who owns a rocket company, an AI company, and a whole-ass social media platform—is less interested in stopping naked shorting than in defending his ego from a historically-themed roast.
We’re out here watching companies get “cellar boxed” into oblivion. A literal 2004 post laid out the entire naked shorting blueprint:
https://archive.is/KSS6m
Spoiler: it’s real, it’s horrifying, and it’s still happening.
Here’s the TL;DR of priorities:
| Crime | Who’s Getting Sued? |
|---|---|
| Counterfeiting shares | No |
| Market manipulation | No |
| Retail theft | No |
| Getting called a WW2 villain | YES |
This is why retail doesn’t trust anyone anymore. If Elon truly wanted to be the meme lord hero of free markets, he’d shine that spotlight on market fuckery, not Twitter beefs.
So yeah, DRS your shares. Sip some tea. Watch the world burn in 4K while billionaires sue each other over insults while ignoring the actual rigged casino.
We’re not in a market. We’re in a meme war with an SEC audience.
